Let the Games Begin . . . Earlier

I love the Olympics. The inspirational stories, the gold medal victories, the impressive physiques of the male swimmers. I love it all. So why do the t.v. scheduling people wish to deprive me of my entertainment? WHY IS PRIMETIME FROM 8 P.M. TO 11 P.M.?

You all know that 8 p.m. is pretty much the end of my primetime. And yet, that's when the Olympic coverage begins. And they always show the same things between 8 and 9:30. I've been watching a lot of synchronized diving and beach volleyball. Which means that night after night, I've watched the Chinese absolutely SPANK the other countries in diving and Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh kick sand in the faces of any who dare to challenge them on the beach volleyball court. This is all very nice and entertaining, but I would really like to see some gymnastics, already. By the time those gymnasts mount their pommel horses and balance beams, I'm drooling into my pillow. I just can't stay awake that late, even for my beloved floor exercises. I feel cheated.

And another thing. You know those McDonald's commercials? The ones that show Olympians, in all their muscled and fit glory, making inspirational comments about why settle for silver and they're not going home without it? And then they bite into a fried chicken sandwich from McDonald's? Shall we all call McDonald's out on this bullshit? Yes.

WHAT IS THAT BULLSHIT?

Does McDonald's really expect the viewing public to believe that these men and women got to the Olympics by eating a fried chicken-like product on a "buttery-tasting" biscuit from McDonald's? Apparently, McDonald's believes people will run right out to purchase one of those disgusting-looking sandwiches (even in the commercials, when they've been presented by food stylists, those things look gross) in their pursuit of six-pack abs and Olympic glory.

Please. My intelligence is insulted. As are my taste buds.

So, in summary, I wish the Olympic scheduling committee to contact me regarding MY schedule before the next Olympics, so I'm sure to be awake during the good stuff, and I wish McDonald's to get a grip on reality already and quit using prime examples of human fitness to hawk their nasty grease bombs.

Thank you for your attention.

P.S. If you would like to see something amusing, go over to Finny's site for the Grow Your Own Round-up today (round-up number 14, in fact--that's a lot of rounding up). There are all kinds of seriously beautiful, seriously fancy actual recipes on there. And then there's mine. I have this song in my head, "One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is not the same . . ."