Monday, March 12, 2018
Practically Health Food
Currently in my refrigerator is a six-pack of Chillin' Cherry Squeezers. I guess you would call them juice? I think they're a juice product in the same way Velveeta is a cheese product.
The reason they're in there is because A. stopped to help an old lady shovel her driveway last week after a pretty good snowstorm, and she decided to thank him by bringing by Skittles, M&Ms, and the Squeezers for the children.
Apparently, neighborly snow removal=sugary thank-you gift.
Anyway.
The drink is, of course, disgusting. Jack got to try some with his lunch and it smells exactly like cough syrup. I didn't taste it personally. The smell was enough for me. Cubby, who has an active and vocal loathing of anything flavored with artificial cherry, is going to be very disappointed.
Anyway again.
The hilarious thing about this beverage, though, is the two prominently displayed announcements on the packaging that proclaim "certified gluten free" and "no high fructose corn syrup*."
Well! Practically a health food!
Despite these obviously superior health benefits, however, I think we'll stick with milk.
* It has sucralose in it instead. Plus a hell of a lot of food dye.
How very nice of the lady to think of the children.
ReplyDeleteI have a lot of theories on the providing of sweets to children. I think it's like the providing of stickers to children, or the providing of a bajillion giveaways to children at home shows/industry conventions/random walks in the park. All the stuff that was a privilege or an unusual thing when we were kids (I'm 42) or when our parents were kids (mine are in their 70s) are now the expectations. Occasional gifts have turned into gifting occasions once a month. Result, kids get way too much. Mine do, anyway. I mean, we've still got Halloween candy in the freezer even after the Advent-calendar-filling extravaganza. And we will get more at Easter, plus some stuffed animals that will rest in a corner within a week and some plastic toys that will surely break within hours. I really don't think Easter is a gifting occasion, but I'm out of step.
ReplyDeleteAnyway. It's well meant, but the freezer is handy. ;)
Karen.