That Time I Was Incredibly Stupid

Okay, so there may have been more than ONE time. But let me tell you about this particular time. Which happened yesterday. When I was canning my shitload of pickled jalapenos.

Yeah. They were supposed to be pickled anyway. I got my brine all hot, heated my enormous pot of boiling water, and had my dad chop all the peppers* because he apparently has no feeling left in his fingers and chopping two gallons of hot peppers doesn't bother him in the slightest. Besides, I always put my visitors to work.

I loaded up the jars, poured in the brine, plopped on the tops and screwed on the rings, then put them in the canner.

Then I realized I had neglected to put any vinegar in my brine. So. Not so much with the pickling then, huh?

Shit.

So I took them all out of the boiling water, unscrewed all the rings, took off the lids, and strained the peppers through a sieve to get rid of my useless, vinegar-less brine. And it made me want to die.

Not because of the waste of time or the irritation at being so incredibly dumb. But because physically I was a mess. The peppers had been heated, you see, in the liquid. And so they were releasing whatever volatile compound it is that causes irritation to the eyes, nose, and throat. It was like chemical warfare in my kitchen. I was sneezing and coughing; streaming tears; and cursing the peppers, myself for being so stupid, and the universe in general.

It was not a good time.

However, I did get all the jalapenos (nine pints) safely encased in their proper vinegar brine and all the tops sealed. So now I can give them away to other people because I DON'T EVEN EAT THEM.

Yeah. So that was the time I was incredibly stupid. I hope you enjoyed the tale of my idiocy. Check back tomorrow to see what other brain lapses I might have. Fun.

* Oh, right. Did I not tell you my parents are here for a few days? They are. Say hi to my mom and dad!