I get a lot of comments on this site along the lines of, "Is there anything you don't do?" Usually after I post something about shoveling the driveway by myself or butchering deer or doing our taxes myself. All things, I notice, that are traditionally a man's job. But despite the fact that A. and I have a generally old-fashioned relationship (in that he works and I don't), I do not have the luxury of refusing to do anything but "women's work." There ain't no such thing. I do what has to be done when it has to be done. I can't be sitting around, wringing my hands and waiting for A. to get home from work all the time. Not only would that be lame, it would also be totally unfair to him.
But there are some things at which I do draw the line. For instance:
1) I don't run the chainsaw. Ever. This has less to do with my hatred of machinery in general and more to do with the fact that our chainsaw is particularly big and heavy. It's professional grade, not just for homeowners. I can hold it, and it's possible I would be able to cut with it, but I just don't feel like I have the physical strength necessary to operate it safely. I'm strong for a woman, but that is most definitely a tool built for a large man. Like A. Have at them trees, babe! I'll just stand waaaay over here . . .
2) I don't cook organ meats, innards like tripe, or seafood. I don't eat any of that stuff, I don't know how to prepare it, and I don't want to deal with it. So there. This is the MiL's gig. She has no fear. One time? She made Lobster a l'Americaine? Where you have to cut up a LIVE LOBSTER with a meat cleaver? Yeah. Do not mess with the MiL, y'all. She's not afraid of ANYTHING in that kitchen.
3) I don't make hot cocoa. I'm not sure how this happened, but A. is the Official Cocoa-Maker To Blackrock. And I'm not talking dumping a package of Swiss Miss into some hot water. Ew. No, this is REAL cocoa, made on the stove. With real milk and real cocoa powder (Drost--a fancy brand that tastes WAY better than Hershey's) and lots more cocoa powder than sugar. I've gotten spoiled. I won't drink hot cocoa any other way now. And A. always has to make it. Luckily, he's usually amenable to drinking it himself, especially when he sneaks a little brandy into his cup, so he makes it without too much grumbling.
4) I don't build things. Somehow, the carpenter gene passed me by. My sister and brother are excellent carpenters. They spent a lot of time in the woodshop with my dad when we were kids. Me? Never interested. I can and will fix things, I can nail things together and jerry-rig 'em to hold up for awhile, but I will not start out with some boards (or a tree) on my own and end up with a structure. I'm just A. the Carpenter's assistant, and that role is just fine for me.
There's probably more, but not much more. I really will attempt almost anything if necessary. Is there anything you refuse to do? Kill bugs? Iron clothes? Mow the lawn? Do tell, duckies.
16 comments:
I don't sew. Booooooring.
I'm like you in that way. Other then I am not married so I end of having to do it. Up in AK I hunted birds. Some people thought that that was odd. But I had a .22 and went hunting. I do have a chain saw. But its light and only 14in saw so I can handle it. When i can get it started! I have a skill saw and do some light building. Shelves and stuff. I sometimes wish that I had somebody to do that stuff. I dread this summer as I need to put up some fence and I dont like to dig holes with the post hole digger.
I do almost everything around here besides ironing. I also don't have an aversion to doing "manly" chores. My parents taught us to be self-sufficient in case we didn't get married. My dad made us girls carry heavy stuff, learn to hunt, build things, and change a tire. The result is that I'm often better suited for doing those things.
I do all the gardening, lawn care, heavy lifting, etc here at Chiot's Run. Unless it too heavy for little me, then I call out the big guns - Mr Chiots. He does do all the ironing though, I would rather wear things wrinkly than iron. On occation he's made me take off a shirt and ironed it for me.
Mr Chiots does take care of the car care now and he works all the time at our business. He works hard so I can buy stuff for my gardens. We have developed a perfect working relationship in these areas!
Just a note on the lobster: The only recipe I used for it is from my very first J. Child cookbook, from her early TV shows in the early-mid sixties. More recent recipes don't seem to call for sauteing the cut-up lobster in the shell. When I was doing the evil part of the recipe I vowed never to do it again. Then I tasted the result. No qualms in the future. The flavor, the flavor--it's amazing.
What I don't do? I don't mow lawns. I may come to it some day, but I've never had to--
Way to go Mil! That is some kitchen bravery I have yet to attempt.
What don't I do? I don't iron. We don't even own an iron - though I've thought about getting an old one from Goodwill to wax our skis...
Also, I consider it one of my rights as wife to no longer have to kill spiders.
Does your mil use a chainsaw in the kitchen?
It's kind of an awesome visual.
I don't do LOTS of things. But, I'll never pretend there's a principle behind any of it. Just straight-up wussiness. Also: I never in a million years thought I'd associate the word cute with A. But A. as dedicated hot cocoa maker? Figgin' cute. We're Drost people too. Hurrah for the Dutch!
I can't think of anything off the top of my head that I am totally unwilling to do. Sure there's plenty of things I'd rather avoid, like unclogging drains, cleaning the toilet, killing bugs.
Oh wait. There is one thing. Unless someone's friggin' life depends on it I will NOT stick my hand in the garbage disposal. I once accidentally dropped some fishbowl rocks in the disposal and instead of retrieving them I just left a post-it note on the wall warning the next person.
Is butchering deer a "man's job"? I grew up in Montana, so I know a few ladies who are very proficient! One even tans her own hides. Anyway, that leads to my line... killing things. My dad always made fun of me because I'm fine once it's killed to help with grinding, cooking, etc., but I just get overwhelmed at the thought of watching something die.
I always felt like the biggest wuss until I moved from Montana to Vancouver. There I was the tough mountain girl because I got jerky as a care package rather than cookies. :)
But despite the fact that A. and I have a generally old-fashioned relationship (in that he works and I don't)
You don't work?!!!! Oh, girl, YOU WORK. And if there was an income value on your work, it would rival a lawyer :)
Oh, I'm so relieved. Because if you could build things or operate a chain saw, I'd have to smack you.
There's so many things I don't do, this comment box couldn't contain the list. Here's one thing I DIDN'T do yesterday: unscrew the shower drain grate and reach down and extract the large ball of hair restricting water flow. Ewwwwww. Thank god for men.
I don't sew. That gene skipped a generation. My mom does, and my daughter is willing and able. I've gotten lazy with the "manly" chores like snowblowing because I injured a wrist starting the snowblower a few years ago and hubs has taken over that chore. I let him.
I help my Farmer do alot of "Man Jobs" and I have fixed fence rather then have to chase cows later. I mow, alot. I scoop snow. Feed cattle. Have driven the tractor but normally don't. Hauled seed bags. Chopped weeds in the beans. Helped pull calves. Helped sort cattle. Chop ice on the pond. Feed hay by hand. Paint fences & out-buildings. Dig holes and move dirt by hand. Helped level the back yard. Laid & leveled railroad ties for the driveway sides. Hauled bags of stones and put down river stones for a ground cover
But being a pansy & scaredy-cat, I don't do mice or rodent in any form- dead, alive, real, fake, imaginary, on tv. Not at all! If they get caught in the trap, they stay there until Farmer comes home. If I see mice in my house, I run outside and wait in the car until he comes home.
I also don't do anything with the cars. I probably could figure out how to change oil, etc. but I don't have to.
And I don't use the guns. Once upon a time he showed me how to load the .22 but I've forgotten how and I'd probably shoot out a window or something.
And fair enough, Farmer can do basic laundry and basic cooking. He might be able to sew on a button, maybe. He also vacuums if I ask him to.
It's called being marriage partners.
I agree with Country Midwife; you work, all right!
I can't say that there is anything that I refuse to do.
Except cut up a live lobster. That I would refuse to do in a heartbeat. Props to MIL.
I always say I don't "do plumbing", but as soon as I said that, something exploded, I'm sure. And so, it turns out that I DO do plumbing. Barf.
I don't deal with the trash though, that's all Bubba.
I, too, am afraid of very little when it comes to the kitchen. I'm also known for giving raw whole chickens a "last dance" on the counter before I rip out their innards and slam them in the oven.
I do not use the chainsaw, the lawn tractor, or the real tractor. I don't do electricity with the exception of the electric fence. And I'm a whizz at that I do not fry. Otherwise, I'm it.
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