Monday, April 21, 2008

I'm Not Worthy

Remember the Dutch Baby? Impressive, right? Y'all*, that was amateur hour compared to the display the MiL and her sisters created yesterday for their mother's birthday tea. I may be prone to exaggeration at times (shocking!), but I am not exaggerating in the slightest when I say that this went way beyond any fancy catered event I have ever attended. And to prove it, here's the food roll call (and a photo, which is once again pathetically bad):

Quiche Lorraine, vegetarian quiche, pork/venison/mushroom pies, pastry puffs stuffed with chicken salad, egg salad sandwiches, cucumber and cream cheese sandwiches, biscuits (this was my sole contribution--go me!) with butter and homemade raspberry jam (oh, I guess I made this too, last summer), cranberry bread, fruit cake, apricot cookies, shortbread, chocolate cake, coconut cupcakes, AND cheesecake. Plus coffee and tea. And beer and red wine and white wine and sherry, because we want our alcohol, even at a tea.

Keep in mind, please, that none of this was store-bought; pie shells, cheesecake, breads--everything was from scratch. These women do not mess around.

Once again, I see that there's no way I'm ever going to be this kind of domestic goddess. The MiL has announced her intention of having a big party for her 60th birthday. But no pressure, right?You think I could get her sisters to cater it for me?

*A note about the use of the word "y'all" in blogs: I've seen it used by people who are so clearly not Southern and would never use this word in real life, but have picked it up as some sort of blogging style. This really bugs me. So I feel the need to establish my credentials: My mother is from New Orleans and I spent the first 5 years of my life in the Deep South. I don't have the accent, but I do use "y'all" in my everyday speech. For which I take some shit up here in Yankee country, but it's how I talk, so it's how I write too, sometimes. I feel better having explained myself. Because I'm sure you really cared.


mil said...

Kristin protests too much: her biscuits are the best, bar none, and how many people do YOU know who go pick raspberries and make the most incredible jam?

The pastry puffs are a snap. Biscuits, now, they require both skill AND judgment.

SaraPMcC said...

Wow, Kristin, MiL totally deserves all that praise, but your MiL praising you like that? Fantastic. And I'm sure absolutely true; that bread you made us for the holidays was delicious. Nice spread, both of you.

The Barber Bunch said...

Looks like they did a great job!


The Constant C said...

As the sort of person who responds to footnotes (seriously, why DON'T I have a PhD?): I use y'all, and there's nothing remotely southern about me. The lack of a plural you in modern Yankee English is just too much of a handicap to be borne gracefully. So, y'all all you want to.

Sophie said...

deeelicious. i would've loved to attend! sheesh, i just had to throw away my biscuits b/c i just can't get that yummy taste. i'm on my second batch; the first recipe called for a tablespoon of baking soda...does that sound right to you? they tasted AWFUL so i had to throw them away, i decided to bake up a recipe from pure "experience". have any tips!? i'd love em!

Julie said...

That layout of grub looks awesome. Don't worry about the y'all thing....I tried to quit saying it when I moved from the south to Arizona. Then it slipped back in, along with "fixin' to" which I take a lot of crap for. Anyway, your MIL is awesome!