Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Three Shitty Things Before Breakfast

Alice (as in Wonderland) may have believed in six impossible things before breakfast, but I think I got her beat with my three shitty things before breakfast today.

It is 7:32 a.m. So far, I have done the following things:

1) Bailed out and plunged a plugged toilet. The bailing was necessary because the toilet was so full it would have all slopped on the floor if I had just stuck the plunger in. And yes, there was shit in the toilet. So that's number one. Or should I say number two? HAHAHAHA!!

2) Disposed of a mess the dog made in the back hall, consisting of pee and, SURPRISE!, shit.

3) Scrubbed down A.'s jeans that I had been soaking in preparation for washing. He wore them when we sheared the ram, and so they were encrusted in (wait for it) . . . shit.

So let's recap: human shit, dog shit, and sheep shit, all cleaned up, by me, before I even had a cup of coffee.

Pollyanna, where are you? I need to find the silver lining to this particular shitty cloud. Oh wait, I got it: At least the day can't get any shittier!

I think I need to go back to bed.


SaraPMcC said...

Please go back to bed. It sounds like the worst day ever. That way, when you get up, you can pretend like it's a new day.

The Barber Bunch said...

Boy....sounds like your day was full of shit.

(sorry..... I couldn't resist)


Anonymous said...

Thanks for sending me the link. I never thought much about you being so new to the country - you have officially become more country than me and I grew up on a farm!

I have had my hands in a lot of shit lately as well, but it's the human baby variety. Sheep dog and human all in one morning - now that's a feat.

Hope your day gets better from here!!!


mil said...

The silver lining: mil cleans the cat litter (when you remind her--.

I might just leave Leda in the pasture tonight.

YDavis said...

The Barber Bunch wrote: "Boy....sounds like your day was full of shit." Can't top that!
Sorry your day started out that way. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Krysta said...

I know when you say "I had a shiity day." you aren't lying.

Anonymous said...

Dear God, woman! There had better been whiskey in that coffee!

If I had to live through your morning, I would still be gagging by 2:30pm.

Seriously. The dog shit I can handle, but if I had a clogged toilet, I'd probably just put the house on the market and call it a day.

tu mere said...

Hey, you could have had the guy from "Dirty Jobs" over. Sounds like one of his mornings. Guess that goes to prove that bad things happen in threes (although you did make a choice with A's jeans).

Tomorrow morning will definitely be better - or at least different.

SaraPMcC said...

Seriously, A.'s jeans should've gone right in the garbage. And I agree with jiveturkey...whiskey in the coffee. All day.