Lambs Gone Wild

The five lambs have been chowing down on their pasture to the extent that they've somewhat exhausted the grass in there. Little piglets. So A. has been letting them out to graze on the property at large. This is fine, to an extent. They have mostly been hanging out on lawns distant from the house, eating forsythia leaves and grass. Except yesterday, the lambs lost their tiny little minds.

I kept finding them on the lawns right next to the house. Next to my laundry, specifically. And you might not know this, but sheep have no bowel control. They just shit wherever they happen to be standing. So if they happen to be standing near the house, that means there will be sheep shit near the house. I drove them away repeatedly (with the help of Rita the No-Longer-Pitiful Puppy, who just LOVES to herd sheep), but they kept coming back.

Then, later in the afternoon, I went outside to discover them standing in the shed. Eating wet newspaper. Really? Newspaper? What the hell is THAT about? Apparently, they forgot they were sheep for a second and instead decided to behave like goats. So I drove them away yet again, and then called A. to come put his crazy lambs away because they were running wild. He came down and found three lambs grazing on the lawn. And the other two back in the shed, munching newspaper.

He managed to tear them away from their tasty snack by dangling corn in their faces and put them all back in their pasture. Where they have been bawling to be let out again (or possibly bawling for corn--all the bawling sounds the same to me) ever since. At full volume. Non-stop.

I'm going to enjoy those lamb chops this year.