The Ugly Cake Baker

I remember once years ago when the MiL was making a cake, she was cutting the layers in preparation for frosting it and fretting that it wasn't coming out even. I couldn't even see any flaw, but I just shrugged and said, "Put on more frosting; no one will see."

That pretty much sums up my philosophy of cake decorating. And that is why my children end up with cakes like this:

May I present my specialty: The Ugly Cake.

When I made Jack's birthday cake yesterday, I of course didn't have any supplies for decorating it. Do I ever? I did, however, have the caramel M&Ms (which are gross, by the way) Miss Amelia gave Cubby when he brought her some cookies. And the Christmas-colored M&Ms Jack got from the school superintendent in one of those large plastic candy cane things.

This time I colored some of the frosting with cocoa powder to fill my professional cut-off sandwich bag piping tool. I didn't have a lot of the oh-so-aesthetically-pleasing brown frosting, though, which is why I wrote the shortest message I could think of. And clever, of course, because he was turning four. Get it?

Don't ask me what that design around the edge is. I had some frosting left to use up and that's what I ended up with. This is what happens when I listen to my muse.

I figured kids don't care what their cake tastes like as long as it has their name--or, uh, their initial--on it and candles to blow out.

Too bad I couldn't find the birthday candles. 

But you know where I did have some candles? In the Advent wreath in the middle of the table. And how many candles are in an Advent wreath? Four! It's like Jesus guided me to have Jack blow out Advent wreath candles instead of birthday cake candles!

Or like I really need to unpack all these damn boxes so I can find things already. Probably that.

You know what Charlie said when he saw the cake, though? "Wow, Mommy. I didn't know you were so good you could write words on it."

That's right, son. I am just that good. Please always believe that.