Me and Charlie on the porch:
Me: I love you, Charlie.
Charlie: No, you don't.
Me: Of course I do.
Charlie: Well, I don't like you.
Me in the kitchen in the morning making chicken salad for Cubby's lunch, Cubby appears scowling:
Cubby: Mommy, I like it when Daddy is the only one downstairs in the morning. I don't like it when you're here.
All of us in the living room:
Charlie: Daddy is the best.
Cubby: Daddy is fun.
Charlie: I'm going to throw you in the garbage, Mommy.
This morning in the kitchen:
Cubby: I have to eat this nasty egg? You are a TERRIBLE COOK.
Motherhood: The most unappreciated job on the planet.