Pitty Pet is here for you.
Today, Pitty would like to show you all the proper way to relax and rejuvenate your spirit. When he's worn out from his rigorous eating and pooping schedule, he indulges in the following stress-relief techniques.
First, it's important to find the correct spot for your meditation. Pitty Pet recommends a place as close to the woodstove as possible, because warmth is essential to happiness.
Second, you must assume the proper position. Curling up in a ball is optimal. Pitty understands some humans feel the need to suck their thumbs when curled up. This is optional.
Third, and most important, once the position is assumed, you must stay there and remain immobile for AT LEAST three hours, preferably five. You may feel the need to extend your session for as long as seven hours. This may be a challenge, particularly if you are likely to be disturbed by pesky dogs wishing to lick your face or pesky humans who demand possession of your chair. The dogs can be taken care of with a swipe of the paw. The humans may force you to relocate. In which case, you must begin from the beginning.
Perhaps you require a visual?
The Master Relaxer at work.
Pitty Pet hopes he has been of assistance to you today. He accepts any and all tributes in the form of kibble and adoration. Just as soon as he wakes up.
4 comments:
Our cats prefer relaxing on their wondeful queen size pillowtop mattress all day. They get very annoyed when we throw them out to sleep on it at night, and demand to be let back in as early as possible to resume their beauty sleep!
I do want to be a cat in my next life. As long as it's a pampered, indoors cat. No urge to chase mice and fight for all my days....
What a life, huh?!
Makes me wish I was a cat!
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