The Santa Question has been hovering with renewed urgency this year: Will Cubby believe?
Of late I've been getting the feeling that he kind of wants to believe in Santa. Other, random people have already talked to him about it, asking if he's excited for Santa to come, if he's been a good boy, etc. I have no doubt that if I played it up, talked about it all the time, left out the cookies or whatever, he'd be all over it.
But I can't. My mother asked me the other day, "You can't just lie?" Not really.
So I figured it was time for a talk. Just me and Cubby, mother to son. Just to feel him out a little on what he's been thinking about it.
It went like this:
Me: So, Cubby, tell me about Santa Claus.
Cubby: Well, you can't really see him at night. But you can sometimes hear him.
Me: What does he sound like?
Cubby: I can't really explain that.
Me: Well, what does he look like?
Cubby: I can't really explain that either.
Me: Um . . . so, what does he do then?
Cubby: I can't really explain any of it, Mommy.
Me neither, son. Me neither.
At this point, since there did seem to be some sort of belief already there, I told him that Santa Claus is a part of Christmas for a lot of children, that he sometimes brings surprises for them. I did not say that he brings presents; that Cubby could petition him for gifts; that Santa flies around with reindeer. I just couldn't get into it that far. But I did ask Cubby if he thought Santa might come to our house.
He said yes. So Santa will, some way.
5 comments:
here's my bet: he's afraid you'll be disillusioned if he takes away your belief.
Flask has hit it on the nose...he doesn't want you to know the truth...that there really isn't a Santa....that it is all hooey....no fairy tales....no Easter Bunny....no tooth fairy...no Hansel.... no Gretel....no God...no devil...only the truth...the unbiased unadulterated truth that will hurt you to the core.....he just wants you to believe in a little magic.....the world sucks most of the time.....he wants magic for the one he loves.....his mommy.
Beth
Feel free to edit this.
I always told my kids I would never lie to them. When we went to the doctor and they asked if they were getting shots, and if it would hurt, I told them "yes, today you get shots, and it will probably hurt a little bit, like a pinch" and then we pinched each other to see if we could stand the pain, and we could, so it was all good.
When my daughter was around 4 or 5, she asked me if Santa was real. I said, "Honey, you know I told you I would never lie to you, right? So... do you really want me to answer that question?" She thought about it for a few seconds, and then said, "Nope," and walked away.
That works in the other direction, too. With a now-teenage daughter (and another on the precipice) I remind myself all the time: Don't ask questions I don't want to know the answer to.
TOTALLY. We are in this conundrum ourselves. I was never raised with the santa influence and have always thought that I would never bring it up with my daughter. (Until she is older, when we can talk about Saint Nikolas and his groovy story).
I have a bit of a problem with random strangers asking my 3.5 year old if she's been "good" (define "good".) And that she better be good or else she won't get anything for Christmas (Yeah. Just be good so you can get shit. That's good morals.)
So I just ignore the whole thing and when people bring it up I just smile and change the topic very gently...
Seems to be working so far!
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