Mama Sue's Just Good Red Beans

It appears I'll have a revolt on my hands if I don't give you the recipe I use for red beans and rice. It honestly didn't occur to me you'd want a recipe from me, because I'm not a foodie or a recipe writer. Or even a very good recipe follower. Therefore, I make no promises as to the ease of following this recipe. But here it is, straight from the recipe card that I copied off my mom's recipe card, with some additional explanations for you. I made the title up myself. Aren't I just precious? Mama Sue's Just Good Red Beans 2 tablespoons vegetable oil 1 tablespoon all-purpose flour 1 pound red kidney beans (washed and picked through) 1 ham hock or ham bone (or ham or sausage pieces--maybe a cup? Andouille sausage would be traditional, but you can use kielbasa. Or turkey kielbasa. Or even the soy kielbasa substitute. My mom did that when my dad was vegan.) 1 and a half onions, diced 4 small garlic toes, minced (my mom calls cloves "toes"--weird, but cute. Just like my mom.) 1 green bell pepper, diced 1 celery stalk, diced 1 small can tomato sauce (or a half can of tomato paste, if that's what you have) 1 bay leaf 1) Soak the beans in a half pot of water. Use a big pot, 6 quarts or more. You can either soak them overnight or "quick-soak" them. Meaning, bring the beans and water to a boil over high heat, let it boil for a couple of minutes, then turn off the heat, cover the pot, and let it sit for an hour. 2) Drain the water from the beans, then refill with fresh water to an inch above the beans. Add the ham hock or bone now if you're using it and simmer for 2 hours. If you're using the ham or sausage, just add some salt for the first hour, then add the meat in the second hour. 3) Cut up all the veggies in preparation for adding to the roux. You're not going to want to try to chop and stir roux at the same time. You will burn the roux. Just trust me on this one. So chop first. It's like southern stir-fry! Except not. 4) To make the roux, use a large cast-iron skillet if you have it. But you can use any big pan. Heat the vegetable oil on medium heat until hot, then add the flour. Stir together until it's smooth. Then stand there stirring the roux over medium heat. This will take awhile. It's like risotto. Don't stop stirring, and watch the color carefully. Use a flat-bottomed spoon or spatula so you can scrape the bottom of the pan. You really don't want the flour to burn. The flour won't really incorporate into the oil like with a bechamel sauce, so it's okay if it looks separated the whole time. This'll take about half an hour. The color is kinda hard to describe. You're going for something similar to mahogany. Or chocolate. But not dark chocolate. Isn't this helpful? If the roux is a little too light, it won't make a whole lot of difference; it just won't be quite as flavorful. But if the roux is too dark, it will taste a little burned, so err on the side of caution. And if it gets too dark? Eh, I use it anyway. Because I'm too lazy to start over. 5) Dump the onion, bell pepper, garlic, and celery into the roux and mix it all up. Allow that to cook for awhile until the veggies are soft. 6) If you used a ham hock or bone, take it out of the beans, cool a little, then pick off the bits of ham and throw them back into the beans. 7) Stir the roux veggies, the tomato sauce, and the bay leaf into the pot of beans. Taste to see if it needs any salt. It probably will. 8) Simmer at least 2 more hours on medium-low heat, taking the top off for the last hour or so. It will reduce a lot and get thick. You'll need to watch it towards the end, stirring frequently so it doesn't burn. The loooong cooking makes the beans break down and thickens it all. That's what you're going for. It's going to be saucy, not runny. 9) Serve over rice. Butter and vinegar are traditional condiments for this. Put them on the table so everyone can fix their bowl how they like it. I love vinegar and always add about a teaspoon. You could also add hot sauce, if you're into that sort of thing. From my mother's table to yours. Let's all thank Mama Sue. (I don't really call my mom that. NO ONE really calls her that.) Enjoy, ya'll!